The Magical Lamp


Recently some one presented to Jimbo a ‘Lava Lamp’ for his house warming. It’s one of those lamps that have colorful bits inside in a transparent cylinder which floats up and down in clear crystal glue when it is heated by a lamp underneath it.

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Unfortunately, as with all things ‘Made in China’, the instructions that came with it suffer from severe corruption of the English language.

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According to the instructions:

1. If I use the lamp, my patients (wow!) shall be rewarded by magnificent colour change. However it is unclear whether it is the patients who change colour or the lamp; but whatever it is, it is promised to be ‘magnificent’!!!

3. Apparently, one has to find a FAT surface to place the lamp on, which might be a little tricky because fat surfaces are rarely flat.

5. If I use this lamp, I need to work less than 10 hours because of over heating. If not, small ‘peeces’ would float slowly around. Ugh!

The lamp is real nice though. :)

Thurs, 300409 @ 0700

Jimbo – plumber


Ever since Jimbo moved into his new humble abode, he has done a fair bit of plumbing. Nothing major of course, mainly fixing or replacing leaky taps and toilet pumps.

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Gosh! Are my cheeks blushing?

Plumbing is easy and Jimbo much preferred it than, say fixing an electric plug point or cable (Jimbo has this morbid fear of being fried to death). Let’s just say Jimbo prefers to be wet than dry and burnt.

I mean, what’s the worst that can happen when your plumbing work goes awry? You get wet. That’s it. Nobody has actually died from bad plumbing.

There is one particular tap that bothers Jimbo a lot. The contractor who fixed it for him did a lousy job (ever heard of a contractor who joins 2 end of PVC pipe by BURNING them? Haven’t he heard of ‘GLUE’???!!!)

And so, since that horrible contractor claims no liability after he received full payment (anyway, Jimbo already cursed him with a minor ancient Egyptian curse), Jimbo was left with a broken tap that leaks like there is no tomorrow.

Jimbo fixed it once and it was ok for a while until the whole head came off. Then he replaced it with another (plastic) tap but the water jet was too strong, resulting in a person getting a shower instead of a mere hand wash.

And then the leak started again.

Drip, drip, drip…

So, in desperation, Jimbo did some plumbing again. This time with bits and pieces of left over plumbing materials.

And the final product looks like this:

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It looks weird but it’s fully functional! And it doesn’t leak.

In fact, it’s a conversation piece!

:)

Wed, 290409@ 0700; Jimbo is in self imposed exile to avoid the humiliation of appearing on RTM 2 today at 1220!

Shih Tzu puppies for sale


Jimbo’s in-laws’ pair of Shih Tzu dogs had some fun and the result were 5 puppies. One passed away and there were 4. Another got a new owner and there are now 3 left. Here are their pictures:

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Aldy on the left and Feifei (means ‘fat’) on the right

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Smokey

Anyone interested to purchase them (RM 500 each), please leave a comment here and Jimbo will get back to you.
(And no, he does not get any commission).

Mon, 270409 @ 1348

Flashing banana


Warning: Some people might find the picture below offensive; or maybe they just don’t like fruits!

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Some one sent me this picture which Jimbo found amusing and disturbing, all at the same time.

Anyway, while being driven to KL to attend the Kuala Lumpur International Bookfair 2009 last Thursday, Jimbo overheard 2 of his fellow travelers (both ladies) discussing something. A closer listen revealed that they were talking animatedly about their experiences with FLASHERS!

You know, those people who get their high by exposing their family jewels to other people in public, usually to women.

One said that when she was ‘flashed’, she froze for a while and then quickly took off her high heels and ran, in the opposite direction.

The other said, it’s best not to run because that would only gratify the flasher. (Err…so you just ‘stop and stare’??!!!)

“Whatever you do, just don’t drool! Just make like you have seen it all and tell him that his is one of the smallest you’ve come across”, she added firmly.

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The former then related another incident whereby her niece was involved. Apparently this pervert whistled to her at the LRT station and she was curious. She thought the man was selling mushrooms!

Only problem was, on closer look, there was only ONE mushroom for ‘sale’ and it wasn’t really a mushroom!

No prizes for guessing what it was! Heh heh…

Sat, 250409 @ 0700

Crash!


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Jimbo was in such a haste to get some long overdue house chores done yesterday that he rushed headlong into a sliding glass door!

The ironic thing is, he was the one who closed the door moments earlier to prevent insects from flying into the living room!

And so, there he was, post call (and it was a pretty horrible call), tired but wanting to put away some stuff which has been lying around the porch for the last one week after the house warming on last Saturday. Stuff like a banquet table, loads of free milk powder (given by Tesco and destined for the orang asli children Jimbo visits every few months), a potted plant given during the house warming etc etc; and after dismantling the table, Jimbo walked quickly into the living room…

And KABOOM!!!!!

Ow!!! Owww!!!!

OWWWWWWWWWWWWWWwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Jimbo didn’t know what hit him (or rather, what he hit)! One moment he was walking into what appeared to be the living room and the next, he was squatting, right outside the stupid stupid glass door, one hand clutching his forehead and the other, the back of his neck. He blacked out momentarily and was stunned beyond words. He felt like some one hit him with a truck!

Wife and children came running, offering words of concern and comfort and an ice pack.

All Jimbo could think of at that moment was this:

KARMA!!

You see, many years ago, when Jimbo was a medical student in India, a good pal of his walked directly into a glass door at a restaurant and he fell backwards. The result was a nose bleed and bruised ego.

Jimbo laughed so loud and hard, he was crying buckets of tears of mirth. In fact, he almost doubled over in laughter. His buddy didn’t see the humour in it. Now, thinking back, Jimbo didn’t think it was very kind to be howling like a hyena at some one’s misfortune.

And so, like a karmic cycle, Jimbo walked into a glass door. The spectacles are crooked again (he sat on them earlier but got them fixed that very afternoon), there was no nose bleed thankfully, but his ego was mighty bruised!

Thankfully, his wife and children had the presence of mind not to roll around like idiotic hyenas laughing their heads off (well, at least not until half hour later when Mrs Jimbo let out a small chuckle).

When related on facebook, some were kind and sympathetic while others, thought it was funny! :(

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Today, Jimbo walks around with a very sore forehead, a very painful neck, a crooked pair of spectacles and feeling very giddy. He’s hoping it’s nothing serious.

Fri, 240409 @ 1232